“When I walked in the door at Watermark I was carrying 43 years of baggage: a divorce, a broken engagement, and one devastating decision I thought could never be forgiven,” Russ Mamoth explained.
“I lived most of my life trying hard to be perfect — whether it was in sports or real estate. I grew up in Kansas, went to Catholic school, and attended mass with my parents. But it was a ritual to me, and faith was not discussed at home. From the outside, we looked like a functional, successful family. But really, life was all about performing to earn approval from my father. I played high school sports, got a college scholarship and went on to have a successful career. But the affirmation never came.”
The Burden
“After I moved to Dallas, I chased affirmation in different ways: relationships with women, partying, career success — whatever. I worked in sales, and my focus was money and what the people I worked with thought of me. It probably looked like I had it together. But inside, I was really self-centered. My friendships and relationships with women were always short-term because I didn’t know how to engage and connect.
“I lived a very isolated life. And I hid my mistakes and failures, including the fact that a woman I was in a relationship with became pregnant. We kept the pregnancy quiet and quickly tried to figure things out on our own. Even though I’d always wanted children, we chose abortion. It was the toughest thing I’d ever gone through in my life, and the guilt and shame stayed with me for a long time.
Grace Made Sense
“In 2007, God put someone in front of me to get my attention. That man was Jason Carroll. I met him and his wife, Pam, through the real estate business and immediately noticed something was different about him. We quickly became really good friends.
“From the beginning, we talked about personal stuff — my broken relationships, pain and struggles. He listened to me like a brother would, and later invited me to go to church with him here at Watermark. “Until the day I came to church two years ago,I’d never heard about a forgiving God. But something clicked as I heard the Truth about God’s love. Grace started to make sense to me.
“Then on Easter Sunday 2008, as I was driving in the car with Jason, he asked a question that changed my life forever: If we had a car wreck that day, how certain was I that I’d end up in heaven? I told him I was 70% sure, and asked him the same question. He said, “Without a doubt, I’m 100% sure.” Then he told me about his eternal salvation through Jesus Christ. That day Jason cared enough to share God’s Word and help me understand how I could be equally as confident in that same Truth.
“It was the first time I had ever heard why we celebrate what Christ accomplished for us on the cross and felt the life-changing power a relationship with Christ offered me. Two weeks later, I was able to tell Jason that my answer had changed, and I was now certain about where I’d spend eternity. With tears streaming down both of our faces, I had the pleasure of sharing that I’d trusted Christ as my Lord and Savior.
“Since then, it’s like a million pounds has been lifted, and I have more freedom than I’ve ever had in my life. I’ve been able to talk about the abortion with people God has put in my life, and they’ve helped me understand what God’s Word says about sin and that I’m loved by Him in spite of it. Is that pain 100% gone? No. But it’s much better than it used to be now that I understand more about God’s grace.
What Really Matters
“My relationship with Christ has changed everything — how I determine success, the choices I make and how I view relationships. I’m not the selfish person I was before, so I can actually have real relationships now because I’ve got a heart to serve others.
“My life used to be all about what other people thought. Now, that just doesn’t matter. I won’t be judged by the house I live in, the car I drive or the achievements in my life. Today, my life is all about what God thinks of me. And no matter where I go, I can’t help but let people know about what’s happened in my life.”
For am I now seeking the favor of men, or of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a bond-servant of Christ. – Galatians 1:10
