Musings on Parenting Pre-Teens and Teens
As Tresha and I continue to think and pray about this stage of our kid’s lives we are beginning to learn a valuable lesson: We are no longer our kids’ first option (Bummer) ….what I mean is for the first 10 years or so mom and dad were the first choice….when our kids got home from school, practice, or I came home from work, they would often initiate talking with us. However, in the last few months especially with my 13 year old twins we are no longer the first option. Often homework, music, email, being alone in their room, friends etc. is the priority. This is not negative nor unexpected. It is the normal process of them becoming independent. However apart from a change of strategy from us we will drift toward separation and that is negative. In order to prevent this separation we as parents need to change. The burden is now on us to over initiate with them. They may or may not always take advantage of our initiation but they will at least feel pursued, and loved. My heart would be that my girls would never question my desire to want to be with them. We are obviously learning as we go but sense a need to make a change in this area of our parenting..
Kyle
Tags: Initiating, PreTeens/Teens
